When your A/B student comes home with a C or D, what do you think? What do you feel? What do you do?

• Do you think something must be awfully wrong?

• Do you go into fix it mode?

• Do you get angry at your student or at the teacher?

• Are you sad and embarrassed because others will think you are a bad parent?

• Are you anxious and worried because you’re afraid your child won’t excel?

All of the reactions above are normal, expected responses from parents.  They are not, however, the thoughts and feelings that will be most helpful in dealing with your children when that “C” or “D” shows up on the report card. Anxieties about your child’s grades are contagious. Your child can sense how you’re feeling and take those feelings on as his own. You’re anxious, worried, afraid and now so is he.

So, think about your answers to the questions so you can be aware of what you are thinking and feeling. Being aware is the first step toward moving to a better place where you are focusing on your child’s thoughts and feelings rather than your own.

Anxiety shuts the brain down and breeds a lack of confidence. Furthermore, a lack of confidence breeds failure. The pressure of having to be perfect and get all A’s and B’s can stop learning in its tracks. It is when children feel loved for who they are and not for what they can do or what grades they get in school that they are more open to learning – especially learning through their mistakes.

TBD – To Be Continued

The February 21st blog includes  ideas about what you can do when that C or D appears on the report card.