We are all responsible for getting out needs and wants met. We cannot do this by expecting others to read our minds in order to help us.
Responsible people say what they need and want, and they expect that others will help them meet those needs and wants.
Irresponsible statement of needs and wants:
Adult: “The gas is low in the car.” Requires the listener to decide what is meant – read the adult’s mind.
Teenager: Ignores the statement. Teenager decides not to get involved in mind reading.
Responsible statement of needs and wants:
Adult: “Will you fill up the tank in the car so I have enough gas for getting to my meeting tomorrow night?” Clearly states what she needs and trusts her child will want to help her out. If that is not possible, she knows she has to look for a different way to get her need met.
Teenager: “I can fill it up in the morning before I go to school.” Teenager finds a way to be helpful. It wasn’t right away, but it was in time to meet the need.
Inspired by: SELF-ESTEEM: A FAMILY AFFAIR by Jean Illsley Clarke.