From a Real Mom: A Question about a Child Speaking Up for Herself


Dear Dr. Mom,

I have tried to coach Ezzy to stand up for herself if there is a problem with another child, but she has a hard time repeating what I say. She is super shy and won’t repeat my words. I guess she figures it was said once why should she say it again – the other kid heard it the first time. Usually, the other child will respond to hearing my coaching and give the toy back or stop doing whatever it was he was doing leaving no need for Ezzy to practice speaking for herself. My coaching solved the situation. But, I must say that those few times that she did speak up, she seemed to feel empowered by having another child paid attention to her words.

Ezzy’s Mom
Dear Ezzy’s Mom,

I think there was some good to having Ezzy there beside you, even when she won’t speak for herself. For other parents struggling with that super-shy child, here is a suggestion. At the end of your comments to the child she’s having trouble with, ask your child if you got it right. Did you say what she wanted to say? If she can say “yes” or even just nod yes, that is another step forward for a very shy child.

If any readers have a question about any topics, feel free to submit in the “what do you think” section at the very bottom of this post.