Featured Picture Book
HOMEMADE LOVE by Bell Hooks
(Available at your local public library or bookstores, including online stores.)
Girlpie was one of the many loving names Mom and Dad gave their little girl. She was the apple of their eyes, the center of their universe. But, …“there is no all the time right.” So, Girlpie also learned about making mistakes right and making “peace again.” She felt always safe. She knew she would always be held up by her parents. Love with no strings attached – that was Girlpie’s story and the story of HOMEMADE LOVE.
What does “love with no strings attached” look like?
- Loving your kids no matter what. No matter if they follow all the rules all the time. No matter if they win or lose the game. No matter how they look. No matter what they can or cannot do.
- Loving your kids just because they are your children, alive, and deserving of love and respect.
- Teaching your kids the skills they need to become independent.
- Having high expectations of your kids, so they can learn to be sure of themselves and hopeful about their future.
- Teaching your kids how to make up for their mistakes, so they know they will always be loved. Teaching them to do more than just say they are sorry and to also do something to take care of the person they hurt.
- Saying no in a straightforward way when you need to. Making sure your discipline is about protecting and teaching your kids rather than punishing them.
What does love WITH strings attached look like?
Letting your kids be the center of attention and rule the household.
Giving your kids so many things that they are never satisfied and don’t really know how to enjoy things.
Failing to set rules that fit your kid’s ages and maturity so they can know how to get along in the world and stay out of trouble.
Excusing or ignoring bad behavior so your kids never learn that their behavior has consequences.
Saving your kids from paying the consequences of their actions or feeling normal sadness and disappointment.
Always saying yes and allowing so many privileges that your kids are never sure they are safe and can take care of themselves.
Love Your Kids No Matter What, Part 1
Love Your Kids No Matter What, Part 2
GROWING UP AGAIN, Jean Illsley Clarke and Connie Dawson
SELF ESTEEM A FAMILY AFFAIR, Jean Illsley Clarke
AM I DOING TOO MUCH FOR MY CHILD? Elizabeth Crary
HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH? Jean Illsley Clarke, Connie Dawson, and David Bredehoft
Surf the Internet:
- self esteem
- natural consequences
- logical consequences